The cake that was…..😁

Sunday afternoon was being it’s usual sleepy slow self, nothing much occurs in this tiny languorous Cul de sac, basking in the late afternoon August sunshine, the only sounds to be heard were the distant tune of a far off ice cream van and the pigeons splashing boisterously about in their freshly filled bird bath….I lay reading in my cool shady back bedroom away from the heat, A soft breeze flicking the yellow rose curtains at the open window, I have grown quite accustomed to this new found stillness, infact so much so I jumped physically when my phone let out an unwelcome ping to shatter the silence… It was however as it turned out to be a nice surprise, My friend Debbie checking in on me, making sure I still drew breath, its Good to know that other than Sage and the pigeons my demise would be noticed, before I vanished totally off this mortal coil for good😁, She preceded to ask whether I would like to go out for one of our coffee and cake outting in the week, This of course is a more rhetorical question really, because cake refusal can only ever mean but one thing regarding me!!!!, I’ve got some diabolical deadly sickness, like a Tsetse fly bit me in the night and I’ve developed some huge glowing red appendage smack in the middle of my forehead, Maybe I’ve contracted Bubonic plague, Barbados flu, Gangrene, Distemper, hardpad or all of the above….😊

There be people out there!!!!

We back and forth with suitable days, before settling finally on that coming Thursday morning, I always look forward to these small adventures deep down once I’ve moaned about it of course, but then I am British😊….it’s just the actual getting myself ready part that I find hardest, not that I’ve a large extensive wardrobe to go through, nor am I the Imelda Marcos of the shoe world…it’s just I have to shower, find something halfway decent enough to be seen out in public kind of thing….oh well the allure of cake proves powerful enough of an incentive, of course Debbies well aware of this 😊, don’t you just love cake? Even the word is scrumptious 😁😁 sighs!!! it’s my one true weakness,

Thursday morning arrives….

I wake up early mainly because I loathe rushing about readying myself, I achieved it without too much of a kerfuffle, . Once ive located the house keys, I open my front door ready for Debbie,s imminent arrival, this buys me a few minutes in which to shuffle about doing anything last minute…As I mentally go over that last minute to do list…A small soft voice from out of nowhere calls yoohoo hello!!!!!, I look about the room, Sage my noble Budgie sidekick is a brilliant talker, but this is a feminine voice, clear in pitch without Sages usual vocals….only leaves my plants and I know I converse with them daily, but if they’ve started to say hello or good morning in reply this is surely cause for concern right?..Maybe I’m just getting better at talking to myself!😊😊😊😊😊, but no, there it is again! …what the actual baby cheeses is occurring!!!!!?😁

An unfamiliar face suddenly appears at my front door, like an apparation, …unsure who this stranger is im at first a little perturbed, after the initial shock i remember my manners, returning the hello as I walk toward the open front door, A lady is stood there, her large taupe handbag slung over one arm, her hand clenched fistlike as if to form a barrier from it slide off, .On looking at the face before me I find it warm, a cheerfulness I find of interest… Slightly lined, but the lines are soft, cheeks smooth, dark brown eyes meet mine and at once crinkle at the corners,. A beautiful smile plays across this new face, She introduced herself before slightly turning to her left, she puts a hand out to include her silent friend I hadn’t until then noticed…Both ladies are immaculately dressed, in that Sunday best,off to church type apparel…Its only then it dawns on me, too late of course !!!!! They are infact Jehovah’s witnesses, now I’ve nothing against them, but they do like to talk at me,….My face being the proverbial open book shows everything… I am though immediately sorry, for they have their job to do and I can at least remain friendly….Manners maketh the personage and all that…😁

The first lady looks back to me before starting up a conversation I hadn’t expected at all… Her focus is on the array of odd sized tubs and pots I keep under my sitting room window…She said “I was telling my friend here I thought I had spotted some Swiss Chard growing in amongst your flowers”…, I can’t help but smile now as I’m justly proud of the brightly coloured stalks of the what is in fact rainbow Chard,. Their deep green broad leaves poking up betwixt the crimson flowers of my favourite geraniums, Orange, yellow and deep red stalks contrasting wonderfully, …I take time out then, to show off the dark purple flowers of my runner beans, who have somehow managed to wrap themselves about lone sunflower, tall waving pale green leaves of celery plants sharing planters with delicate ballerina type fuchsia flowers, Chives, basil, mint and parsley neighbouring showy bright pink flowering Pelagonia, self set strawberries cropping up Willy nilly where ever and whenever they choose😁, Orange, yellow, and red tomatoes clashing violently with their sweet clove scented Carnations pot mates… The ladies at once remark how unusual it is for vegetables to be grown along with flowers, I in truth had never thought about it, I do it because space is somewhat limited, roughly about 8ft by 2ft…where I keep my half a dozen pots…it works wonderfully, the strong scented leaves of Geranium protecting the chard and herbs…it also looks pretty darn good, and I for one like it😁, it appeals to my sense of disorganised organisation…it does also to my new acquaintances, although she was still a little amused if I’m honest 😁….

About five minutes later Debbie arrived, she’s already spotted the Jehovah ladies straight off the bat, no fooling Debbie… And instead of a lighting the car as per usual she sits firmly trying to hide in plain sight, for we all know that people sat in cars have an invisibility cloak built in, and are almost always unseen to the naked eye, hence the amount of nose mining you see while people drive alone….I raise a hand across to note I’ve spotted her, she’s firmly ensconced in the drivers seat either pretending to check her phone or she’s about to ring me giving me the option to extricate myself from the ladies… But it’s not needed Debbie,s spotted by the dear ladies who at once take their leave, merrily waving to me as they walk away, still talk of my strange approach to mixed gardening can be heard….. It was an odd sort of day, I had maybe converted them, not the other way around😁.

I grab my keys from the door, pick up my phones and bag, check the door is indeed locked for the tenth time, then We are soon making our way to find the nearest available watering hole and that all important cake supply… We pass through several quaint villages in our pursuit of all things cake…As long as I’ve lived here I never tire of looking at the creamy yellow Yorkstone cottage exteriors, the pretty garden borders or the fern covered garden walls, it’s like time has halted, capturing these scenes for all time, My mind often plays tricks, at these moments, I expect to see a ladies in Victorian attire climb into a waiting carriages, or gossiping with others on street corners…but alas there’s none.

Finally we come to our destination, it’s the Quaintest little tea room, all bay windows, bunting and hanging baskets,…a typical example of British tea rooms everywhere.. it maybe early yet, but already a healthy throng is gathering outside the open door….I’m immediately somewhat anxious that we wont be able to find a table or at least someplace to sit….but I need not of worried for just inside the garden gates, there’s the perfect spot at a white round wrought iron table for two….it’s a little rickety but serviceable all the same, I plonk myself down upon the nearest seat, Poor Debbie has drawn the short straw and braves an ever growing queue, As I wait Im taking in the surroundings, it’s placed directly next to a pretty little ford…an ancient arched bridge spans the waterway,it’s terracotta brickwork peppered with dew laden mosses ,ferns and dandelions, ..I note straight off for a tiny village cafe it’s kept exceptionally busy….

My favourite past time of people watching begins in earnest as I wait, it seems like a wonderful meeting place for local friends and families, dogs were also welcome, many still covered in water droplets from that impromptu swim in the fast running shallow waterway…pink tongues loll, grinning happy faces as panting dogs dart to greet anyone within their path, no one minds either…there’s dogs of all breeds and size, all off lead, playing and sniffing around the tables, it dawns on me, these too must be old friends as not one scuffle breaks out the whole time I’m there….I put my hand out to caress the silky smooth coat, of a amber eyed liver and white Spaniel…it turns wiggling its whole body with enthusiasm, brushing its wet coat against my legs, Tillys owner calls her away, apologising profusely, I put my hand up and smile to let her know it’s fine, in fact it’s more than fine…but too late an obedient Tilly has long gone….

Even though there’s no where near enough tables to cater for the ever increasing numbers, most are happy to perch somewhat precariously upon the narrow stone wall, backs to the water..this puts me ill at ease straight off, as edges, heights are still an existing phobia of mine, I try not to look, but of course, this is never going to work as my eyes are repeatedly drawn back, almost magnetically to the very spot..I can feel my anxiety levels build as people walk close to those sat on the wall(my imagination kicks into overdrive, I’ve already got these poor folk pushed into the water screaming and drowning in the far to shallow depths to drown an ant😊, all by evil passers by I just know it!!!!!) …shaking the unwelcome vision from my head, i pick up my phone, distracting myself with taking pictures of the protruding wall ferns, I identified at least three of wonderfully named plants as Harts tongue, Wall rue and Maidenhair spleenwort😊, all growing very healthily in between the bricks mortar…by the time that’s losing its allure, Debbies back carrying a heavily laden tray of goodies….

Cake……

My eyes are locked onto the delicate China tea plates, both of which have a huge slice of the lightest sponge cake in creation, I can tell before Debbies lifted it from the flower covered tray I’m going to love it…As a connoisseur of all things cake I can hardly wait to taste it’s deliciousness, I look at the tiny tiny silver cake fork, I’m already aware this will be a trial of cake etiquette, I’m longing to pick up my slice of heaven,and devour this glorious moist homage to lemon and blueberry cake, the whole world over, but I dont, I’m good, I pick up the doll sized fork and delicately pop ladylike sized portions into my mouth….but it’s worth everything, I’m in rapture, I’m sure Debbies talking someplace off in the distance, people still pass by in a blur, the world still turns…but I’m lost, seduced by a rich creamy lemon butter cream icing, the sugary confection has it’s way with me, before gate crashing rudely into my euphoria….it’s been weeks since I had sugar of any kind, most likely months actually!…so the effect is swift,….combine this with the strong caffeine packed coffee and I’m on one loaded high baby, the walls are climbed,…..I no longer care about the folks sat on the wall, or the edges, I hear nothing, see little else other than the fast vanishing cake….I look across to Debbies plate, wondering if I could get away with grabbing her slice before she eats it….too late alas, Debbie equally loves cake…and there’s just a few remaining crumbs to say it even ever existed…. damn!!!!!….. What ever your doing this week folks, enjoy your cake….I mean yourselves and take care of you ❤🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🌺