Into the Vortex….

it was one Weird wet and wild Wednesday

I had been awake most of the previous night doing the two cover shuffle,(you all by now know the one) starts both covers on, covered right up to my neck, covers off, one cover on, feet hanging out the bottom, half a cover on, and so it goes on throughout most of the night or indeed until I’m far too exhausted to even care anymore, normally this is around 5am mark, by laying there awake though I have had an opportunity to quietly listening to the rain outside fall, its rhythmically soft pattering beats against my windows, it’s almost hypnotic in tone, that balm to my by now over fractious nerves, wind howls around the flat, whipping up anything in its wake, only for it to land back down someplace else with a loud clatter, I find though I don’t mind this, strangely it is in fact somewhat of a comfort.

I finally give up on even trying to sleep as is my won’t to do.(often), laying there trying only frustrates me even more, I normally get up and find something to occupy the extra hours, like cleaning the kitchen, bathroom, whatever. anything but clock watch..sometimes though I do lay back down and drift in and out of sleep while I’m supposed to be watching some programme or another😁….that afternoon while i write, a voice from my phone breaks the companionable silence, and it’s of course Jesse informing me, “by the way, your air fryer is coming Friday” …..I look up from my tablet, ” my what’s what’s coming when? “. This is news to me…..

I should fill you in on a few things here….if ever either one of us will mention we are thinking of getting, or like something….the other will sneak off quietly to Amazon and order it…I had been watching Jesse use his Airfryer, for a few weeks now, and have liked the resulting food, it’s kind of like magic …you shove something in a drawerthingy…press beepy buttons, do this pre wash I mean pre heat wotsit…And ten minutes later or there abouts ping and tahdah!!!!!!!!, Golden brown cooked gorgeousness, I’m thinking aloud one day to myself, I really should invest in one of my own….my mistake there is I said it aloud 😁, Anyway I admit I was somewhat taken aback, but it’s the kinda sweet thing Jesse does…

Friday morning

Im also expecting deliveries, and of course Thursday night’s the one night of the week my body decides it needs to sleep,lots of bloody sleep, it’s not to be just light sleep either, it’s that kind where your neighbours could be jackhammering down partitioning walls next door and you don’t budge, marching bands can practice outside your window, and your still being the sleepy percussion section all on your ownsome😁…., I finally stir though, eyes flicker open enough for me to realise it is in fact a new day or morning!!!!!!, Just as my still sleep infused brain tries hard to process this information, I hear a dim and distant ringing in my ears, firstly I lay in wait for it to dissipate(no one like ringing in the ears)….but it doesnt, no instead it just grows louder and more insistent, finally it dawn’s on me, someone’s at my door!. Damn….this means my usual rush about, finding trousers, door keys…and my use of the English language.. I have to string real words together….I would say make sense but ermmmm, Anyhow by now I’ve one foot inside the leg of my trousers, trying to grab the keys, looking out of the window at one very bemused postie,. But by the time I get somewhat halfway decently dressed, unlock the door…it’s to see his back walking away..now I’m confused, doesn’t take much folks, especially BC……before coffee.

Turns out, hes made a mistake, he was meant to go next door, sigh!, I go make a coffee, and decide lazily to go drink it in bed, while watching an episode of my latest Prime video addiction….I lay warm and snuggled deep in my pile of covers,… just got passed the recap, music begins…..there’s that blasted ringing again….I listen for a moment in vein hope it will go away 😁, but it doesnt unfortunately, luckily for myself though I do still have trousers on this time, I get to the door to find a very apologetic electrician stood there, tool box in hand(down ladies this is not, I repeat not!!!! A euphemism, false alarm) …he looks across to my neighbours house, nodding in their general direction, ” sorry love I’m meant to knock there” ….I mutter something under my breath about it being ok, well it is still before BC….didn’t get chance to even get a sip of my coffee as of yet….

I make my way grumpily back to bed, lay down, relaxing, about to enjoy my still warm drink before it goes cold, when you,’ll never believe this! 😁, the door goes…….by now I’m taking this personally, (is there a large queue of various people just hiding round the corner waiting for me to go back to bed) I frustratedly fling back my covers, my face like thunder, I wrench open my door, a delivery lady stands there…I think she’s even now picked up on my foul mood, I’m rarely moody as a rule, unless it’s before I’ve had chance to wake up and I’m expected to people!!!!!😁…..it could only happen to me, she was meant to go to another address….I mean once is one thing, twice is a coincidence, three times I mean really !!!

I have decided to give up on ever having a leisurely coffee in bed ever again!!, mostly because the coffee I made earlier is of course cold(I hate cold coffee). I wash, get ready for the day at hand, make yet another coffee, I at least still have the awaited airfryer to look forward too right?!!!!, I confess I was excited, looking forward to air frying anything that didn’t move lol…..

Airfrying…

It arrived, ……..by late that afternoon the delivery guy stood weighed down by this enormous box…wasn’t even sure if it actually was a guy, maybe its box on legs😁….the box bit mumbled something from his hiding place….I presume it was about it being for me…..I take it off his hands, relieved all at once that it was nowhere near as heavy as it looked, And more so that there’s a whole person now stood there, not just a pair of discombobulated legs…..I mumble a thank you from behind my new look box body….

Before I can do anything more, I have to tackle the grand opening of ” The box”….I do declare this thing was nearly as big as my living room, although this is not hard really, But I sit where I can now find an available spot left….puzzled?!, One: should I get out my best permanent marker, draw Windows and a door on this thing and move in…two :Jesse’s air fryer was never this size, I’m amost sure of it, three: where the blooming Nora am I going to put it, my kitchen being smaller than most people’s beds……I scratch my head, then begin the serious business of unpacking the monster…..

After a few choice words, (not any my mum would be proud of I hasten to add) one broken pair of scissors, two broken nails…..I finally get into the blooming box, well actually I thought I had….because low and behold underneath there is yet another box…..I sit getting my breath back before beginning the next endeavour…armed with one side of the now broken scissors……(if it’s broken in half, I have to wondered is that now become a scissor hmmmmm😁, … Very soon have it undone, unpacked and the prized airfryer, sits upon the floor while I’m left panting for air…..with some relief I see it’s nowhere near the actual size of its boxes 😁, I find it’s instructions out,. first line though I swear is a sarcastic unpack your airfryer!!!!!, What does it think I’ve been doing for the last half hour?, I carry on hoping to come across some insightful or at least useful information…..only for it to demand that I get to know my new airfryer….no I’m not kidding either, its what it said in big bold letters…🤔, (so clearing a spot on the sofa, lay down comfy and tell it all about myself,. I actually felt quite good after, it was like many of my early counselling sessions….😁,

I eventually found room for it on the only counter space left, that evening I look forward to making my first meal, well ok a plate of chips 😁, I’ve kind of got to grips with the do,s and donts, whys and where fors..it’s like getting to grips with any new gadget, all takes time…I’ve used it a few times now and in the beginning I was a little nervous, but on the whole I like the way it cooks, chips are crisp and golden, the chicken golden outside but moist and tender…the future relationship with me and my Vortex air fryer looks brilliant…it won’t be long before we are producing many a passable meal together, stay well and safe folks ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤.