Frosted

It’s the Eve of the Eve of the beginning of another new year and these days I look forward to things with a certain amount of hope and positivity. You see, I have plans for changes in this little life of mine. Not resolutions. No, you rarely stick to those right? 😁 No, these are things I’ve, at least, some modicum of achieving. And I know without doubt I need to reach these goals to give me some fulfilment, confidence. These are not huge things understand, they’re not going to be life changing even. Well, not right away, but I believe with time and perseverance, if I just hang on in there, stick to my resolve, it very well may bring about massive results.

Today, despite a tough night, I woke up knowing full well that I was going to take down the Christmas trees, then pack away all the shiny, glittery things I love so very much. Now I say I knew this… whether I actually did or not it was indeed down to how well my coffee kicked in. Right then and there I did not want to leave my bed (so it wasn’t looking good) but leave it I did. I showered, gulped down a molten hot coffee in three swallows and before the cup even had time to cool, I made another. This was going to be a two or three coffee kind of job. I hate packing Christmas away, The morning was so dull already, horribly gloomy and raining. It seemed almost inconceivable to box up such pretty cheerful things on a day like today. I stopped myself thinking about it, procrastination being the enemy of all things achievement wise, before I could change my mind (as I’m wont to do). I began in earnest, knowing full well once I had started I would indeed see the job to its completion.

Once I had the trees down, everywhere looked so empty. (Except now for the pile of filled taped boxes, tangled fairy lights and white frosting off the smallest tree, everywhere was covered. Finally the white Christmas they had forecast each week since June) Rugs, chairs, the shirt that had in fact been freshly laundered just an hour previous, was now smothered, making me look like I had either been stood outside getting snowed upon for hours (some hopes) or had the worst case of dandruff known to medical science.

I worked steadily until job’s completion, lights untangled, batteries recycled, even my throbbing broken little toe could not stop me once I got into my stride. I had had a lovely Christmas despite spending another alone. Myself and Jesse had made the best of a bad lot… cooking some lovely meals, watching old Christmas movies on prime and sleeping. Lots of sleeping! We virtually napped away that whole day, in its entirety, waking to eat, open presents, but mainly just relaxing. It was perfect, just like the massive bouquet of red and white flowers I had been surprised with just the day before. I lay looking at the thoughtful gift, hot eyes prickling with tears, as I remembered the first bunch of velvet soft red roses that December over three years ago, their sender always knowing how touched and warmed I would be. Jesse knows me too well and as he slept I enjoyed their fragrance and dreamed away the hours.

I have to confess though, not everything was relegated to the cardboard boxes. Jesse had bought me a lovely big glass snow globe for Christmas. Inside its dome a pair of crimson red Cardinal birds. I think he was struck by how excited I had been on seeing them flying about outside his house while I was there. Somehow I had forgotten they were native to America. One morning while watching squirrels feed I saw something red flutter and land by the window. Jesse came in to see what had captured my imagination so, to him, this was of course an everyday occurrence. To me who loves these plucky little birds, it was amazing… a dream fulfilled. And so now I have my own cardinals. As I sat looking at them I hit upon an idea: by wrapping a strand of copper wired fairy lights about them I could enjoy the twinkling lights some more. The glittery snow from the globe twinkling in their reflection, bringing light through the long grey winter months, and with it carrying love from one heart unto another.

Whatever you’re doing this new years eve… whomever with… I pray it’s a better year, one that is good to you and your families, hopefully seeing the end of these dark times and bringing fresh hopes for us all. Take care of yourselves in whatever you do and enjoy the fresh new year..💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛😁😁😁😁💛😁💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛x