Grey days and Monday’s …

Last night was yet another wakeful night, I slept in half hour increment,s for roughly four hours finally this morning though, none of it deep or lasting, which in a way is always a blessing, no nightmares ( I have do these Pollyanna moment’s lol) you know playing the glad game, it’s from the film of the same name, cute and worth watching, even though I was exhausted sleep again evaded., a sudden sharp feeling of being cold awoke me , I had as usual shoved all the fleece blankets off during one period of feverish sleep, plus I had my window open , heater off,( like all normal folk right lol) I do not do anything by halves as you will see.

I pulled all the covers up from the bottom of my bed,tightly around my shivering body, swaddled i lay listening to the rest of the world , (which i add is mostly on normal British time for some hours and awake, ) they Go about daily business, and I know eventually I’m going to have to join them and make for the dreaded bathroom , I do my daily infantry, ( it’s wise at this age to check everything’s present and correct, intact , ..Although I don’t need to really, as most of it aches enough to let me know,.. today my back decided to do its thang, it’s stiff , aches and clicks, things move in there of their own volition( I swear, ……….I sit on the edge of the bed waiting for my protesting spine to catch up with me, it cracks loudly, protesting at my need to move, it’s a wonder it doesn’t wake Jesse asleep in phone land ( Jesse, I refresh for those who don’t know, is my fiance over the pond in the USA, we are indeed still on chat 24/7 and have been for nearly two years now) is this a record? ( due mainly to immigration laws.

I look across , his still slumbering soundly, the pain meds I took just hours before hadn’t done much, but had made moving to the bathroom at least achievable,( well I hoped) they were worn off, I look longingly at the packet, but I ration my meds as much as possible these days, …so it’s another morning that I don’t dive out of bed to an annoying jolly jingle and bird song like they do on the tv adverts looking perfect make up in place, no with a whole different set of sound effects, I grumble and shuffle away , it feels like I’m off to conquer Everest, not just going to the loo,

As I wash my shivering body of the night before,s grime , my head over taking my thought pattern, it,s already screaming for strong dark, rich coffee, like a sirens call, it plagues and with it’s seductive words drag me off to the kitchen, where i give in to its whim,s at once . Over the last few days a false spring had got me fooled,we have had some beautiful warmish days, sun beaming, clear azure skies, and even huge bee,s one morning buzzed loudly passed my open window,….but today I swear I heard it was laughing, I could almost hear the words( fooled yahhhhh!!!!) As i shook with cold around my tiny bungalow, every room cold and uninviting, it was Monday, I hate Mondays and I hadn’t slept, had coffee, I hurt , it ain’t !!! Allowed to do cold on me too I tell yah it’s just not fitting!!!!,

I spoke to my room mate,( My rabbit Cinnamon ) who of course I’ve given breakfast , ( his lordship is fed first and foremost of course) he likes a very fresh kale leaf or some room temperature baby spinach served before I can even wake properly, he makes his needs known by at first boisterous ripping up of his news paper, that once lined his domain and shoving it about moodily , or if indeed, mums still away in dream land we then resort to proceed to pick up our ceramic food bowl and drop it till it crashes loudly, reverberating through my sleep addled head, I turn to look around at him, fraughtly calling pleading” I’m getting your food, hang on darling ” His by now sitting staring at me cute nose twitching , adorably pulling one ear down to clean, looking so innocent, the cherub!!!! , …this is part of my morning, every morning and I wonder if my eldery neighbour must think I have a very demanding husband who lays back against the pillows demanding sustenance daily, ( if only lol

I peek outside to see if its as indeed as and dull grey as it feels ,its cold , wet still Monday , I then decide that is as far outdoors as I need to venture for one day, and fling down my curtain disgusted, where’s my spring?, The sunshine, blue sky?…..oh well I turn up my oil filled radiator, go back to bed with my coffee until I can take my meds and stop shaking from this darn chill…. I had only lay there an hour fighting off the lure that is shopping at Amazon( I have an announcement to make about this by the way, which shall be spoken of tomorrow, I’m putting it off lol) …I just got my back comfortable and buried myself deeply under my fleece nest, when as always, that blooming doorbell rang, ..sighing , I dig myself out from under my covers, run fingers through last night’s bed hair and mumble away to myself as I go to answer it, …I don’t fancy anyone’s chances as I look like a walking dead extra from the reject bin and I hurt , not at best a good combination,( I don’t do people before caffeine intake) I get there finally my grumbling by now reaching fever pitch, and as I open the door to yet more freezing air and oh my god real daylight!!!!!!!, …I now must remember how to do that thing called peopling, ( and I don’t wanna) it must have shown as the poor guy shuffled nervously foot to foot, finally after a while him staring at what must have looked like something left over from Michael Jackson’s thriller video or I needed emergency help , He did eventually find his voice” erm Jason ????? ”

Now I know I look bad , but really !?, I look down at my white t shirt covered chest and say ermmmm ” Maybe not hmmm” ….he grins apologetically , ” no ” at his feet is a padded blue thermo bag, Pizza written on one side ….now I love a pizza same as the next person, ( it is indeed a weakness) but for brekkie is a bit extreme right ?, …it isn’t the first time I’ve had delivery guys at my door, trying to shove their hot pizza box in my half asleep hand,s( no not a euphemism) ….since being here it’s almost weekly, some are so convinced I’m Jason , John, Marie or Andy I’m really getting to the point even i,m confused!, .And they really want me to have this pizza,!!!!! one arguing I must be Samantha his gadget phone thingy tell,s him so he says emphatically, !!!!!!!!….I have been tempted to agree before , but I’m honest and have an image of poor Samantha cold, sad but eyes, waiting all sorrowful for her slice of hot cheesey heaven( no not another euphemism I promise) I explain tiredly over again i,m not or indeed never have been Jason, ( I know I’ve scar,s on one breast and abdomen but I’ve always been a Theresa as far as i know, …he walks away head bent over his hand held gadget confused( sorry ) , “saying I better phone the office then”, . I agreed, just wanting to get to my fast chilling coffee and finish this peopling for one day….

There really is no escaping doing this whole socialising thing is there, even though I do enjoy a little interaction with others of the species, I just wish they would be in my strange time frame , ( normally late noon and after at least two coffee,s and a shower) I cannot string one sensible sentence till then , I hope your all staying safe and looking out for one another ❤